Momofuku?

jeff and i went to momofuku last saturday night with...FRIENDS. i'm so grateful for our bible studies, who are not only spiritually encouraging, but also good friends. momofuku is a koren-style barbeque. the dinner was a group format in which we received 2 fried chickens - one korean style, and one southern american style. not so good for our waistline, but delicious. momofuku is a 'hotspot' in NYC - the chef is pretty famous. he also owns a dessert bar (called the 'milk bar') around the corner where we stopped after dinner - famous for their 'crack pie', 'compost cookie', and 'cereal milkshakes'. YUM.

it's funny, because i don't have much...VARIETY to the food i eat. i love mexican, italian and american...but my palate isn't very diverse. i loved momofuku - it was delicious. something NYC has (that most cities don't!) is food of every nation. the lord created so many beautiful cultures, foods, nationalities - and i want to experience it all while i'm here! not only am i exposed to more food here, but i have NO WHITE FRIENDS. this is new to me. i know, i know - i married a chinese man and have always preached about breaking down cultural and racial barriers - but here in NYC (and with my church) it is IMPOSSIBLE to avoid it! it's so beautiful! all of my friends here thus far are asian (korean, chinese) or black. pretty neat. i appreciate them : )

the lord has really blessed us with beautiful weather over the past week (excuse my pastiness in this picture). jeff and i enjoyed a sunny afternoon in central park - reading our books (me in the sun, jeff under a nearby tree.) it was delightful. we live in a great city.

i head to Detroit next week for graduation (yay!) and then we head to ARUBA for our honeymoon! so exciting!

i'll leave with this verse that i was praying over today that was so encouraging:

To Him who led His people through the wilderness, for HIS lovingkindess is everlasting.

Pslam 136:16

through this wilderness of marriage, life in new york city, new beginnings - his lovingkindness is STILL everlasting. praise god.

Much Love.

Graduation!

it's true.  i'm graduating from graduate school in 2 weeks - ahh! i might cry, i'm so excited.  i'm excited to be done with school (forever!), be done with my internship (although i have learned a TON) and get a paycheck!  in the meantime, i have one week of my internship left and then i head home to Michigan for a week to be with family, catch up with friends, celebrate my mom's birthday and mother's day and do the whole 'graduation' thing :)  

after michigan, Jeff and i head to ARUBA for our honeymoon!  we waited until now for our honeymoon (although we went on a 'mini' honeymoon right after the wedding) because we were going through TOO many transitions immediately after the wedding (marriage, moving to NYC, starting new internship, etc.)  i'm so excited to enjoy my hubby, the warm aruban climate and marriage in aruba :)  

jeff and i are officially members of New Life Fellowship - pretty exciting!  we also just interviewed to volunteer at their full-service health clinic.  the health clinic is a part of the church, and mostly run by christians, but a separate non-profit organization (to receive more government funding.)  they serve uninsured people in the community...mm...jeff and i love this idea - serving those in your church's community.  we would love to see how this clinic is run, and maybe (someday), be able to start something like this in Detroit.  oh, how Detroit needs some health care lovin :)

speaking of our hope and love for detroit.... 

something god has been convicting us of is that the HE has us here, in NYC, for a reason. he wants us here. he wants to teach us here. we are not in control of when we leave. in jeremiah 29:7-13: 

seek the welfare of the city where I have sent you into exile, and pray to the Lord on its behalf; for in its welfare you will have welfare....for I know the plans that I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me an come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you search for me with all of your heart and I will be found by you..

ahhhh seeking the welfare of the city of NYC...praying for NYC...BEING IN NYC while we're here....it also reminds me of ecclesiastes 3:1, 11:  

there is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under the sun...He has made everything appropriate in it's time...

so, that's where we're at...or, at least, that's where i'm at... i'm in NYC (for now!) and need to love it like it's my city. 

much love.

"generations will reap what you sow"

i've been reading through 'emotionally healthy spirituality' - a book written by the pastor of our new church, pete scazzero.  it's been a lot to process, and i've been contemplating over his words of wisdom.  the most recent chapter i read was about generational sin - and how the sins of our family profoundly impact who we are, how we form relationships with others, our marriages, families and thoughts about ourselves.  

pastor pete points out that the old testament is filled with generational sin:

• lying (abraham lied twice about sarah; isaac and rebecca's marriage was characterized by lies; jacob lied to almost everyone he encountered; jacob's children lied about joseph's death.)
• favoritism by at least one parent (abraham favored ishmael; isaac favored essau; jacob favored joseph and later benjamin)
• broken relationship amongst brothers (isaac and ishmael were cut off from each other; jacob fled his brother esau and was cut off for many years; jospeh was cut off from his brothers after they sold him into slavery)
• lack of intimacy in marriages (abraham had a baby with hagar-who was not his wife; isaac had a bad relationship with rebecca; jacob had two wives and two concubines)

generational sin ran rampant amongst these BIBLICAL people.  it gave me a little peace to know that God still used these people to write history and display his Love for us lowly humans. in order for me to move forward, and not repeat the generational sins of my family's past, i needed to take a deep look into my family's generational sin.  

the obvious sin that immediately came to mind was addiction.  addiction infests both sides of my family.  alcohol, drugs, gambling - we've got it all! i have grandparents, uncles, aunts and a parent who have struggled with addiction.  i desire for this generational sin to stop here - with me (and jeff.)  i will not allow satan to ruin my marriage, the lives of my future children, my relationships with others through addiction. this generational sin will end here, with me (and the Lord's help.) 

looking and praying more about addiction, and how it has effected my extended family and my immediate family is painful. to think about the lies that covered up addiction, how fake the sense of security we had as children shakes my reality.  what was real? truth is that i saw a counselor in high school about my dad's addiction and the subsequent divorce, but i think i was in survival mode - i just needed to make it through the day.  my brain wasn't mature enough to process all of the baggage that was to come along with this generational sin of addiction. now, as jeff and i dream about what God has for our future, our family, i know that i need to really face it.  

i need to embrace the fact that addiction ruined my parent's marriage. addiction ruined relationships amongst parents and siblings. addiction ruined my sense of home and security. addiction messed with my body image and worthiness. 

i need to admit that i miss having a family. i hate holidays because they are busied with running between my parents. my dad has made choices that will leave him alone. anxiety has infected my life because addiction. i am in constant fear of a relapse. i'm still sad. i won't ever get over it.

yet, i need to embrace the fact that The Lord can set me free from this generational sin. i am not responsible for my parents. addiction can stop here. my children do not need to live with the profound effects addiction can have. 

...this process of facing generational sin may take a while...addiction is only ONE sin!  maybe this is why the Lord has us here in NYC - I don't know that i would have looked into this if i were still in detroit, near the addiction.

on a lighter topic, jeff and i took a 'new members class' today at church - it feels good to be 'anchoring' down here in nyc (although i like to think of it as a temporary anchor, haha, i'm a control freak.) tonight at dinner we discussed how we actually felt like we were a part of a church family today -- like we had friends.  praise god for that :)

well, i need to get ready for the week and get to sleep (yes at 9:30pm, i go to sleep.)

much love.

JD Visits NYC :)

Jeff and I were blessed with Jennifer's visit this past weekend to NYC. She came out on Friday and stayed until Tuesday. This was her first trip to The City (well, she said she had some when she was a baby/toddler.) It was a breath of fresh air to have my girlfriend here - although it did really make my heart long more for some girlfriends here in the city.

The first evening we spent walking around our neighborhood - the Upper East Side. Jennifer's birthday is April 17, so I made a yummy lasagna and brownies to celebrate her :) After dinner, we went to Southern Hospitality - Justin Timberlake's Barbeque/Bar. It was relaxing and enjoyable to catch up with Jen.


Since Jen hasn't officially enjoyed NYC, she had some touristy things to catch up on. Saturday, we explored Times Square, saw In the Heights (starring Corbin Bleu!), bought some NYC paraphernalia, met up with Neil (Jeff's friend from UM) at a wine bar AND had The Original Ray's Famous Pizza (yum!) The musical was excellent (Jen's first broadway show!) and the wine bar followed by delicious pizza concluded a fabulous, yet exhausting, day in The City.

Sunday was Easter. Can I be honest? It really didn't feel like Easter! We went down to 5th avenue to see the Easter Parade (though it was more of a 'gathering', and I think we missed it), strolled through Central Park and then met for Brunch with the Chins. Because Jeff and I go to church in the evening, we had a hard time delighting in Easter. Later that evening, Jen and I met Jeff @ church (he played violin during worship, my favorite.)
On Monday, Jennifer and I got VIP passes to the Regis & Kelly show (thanks, mom!) This was SO exciting. For those of you who know Jennifer, you know she is a pop-culture, TV show junkie (we love this about her!), so going to Regis & Kelly was VERY exciting for her (I won't lie, I loved it too.) We had great seats and got to speak with Regis & Kelly (okay, Kelly is WAY to skinny, especially in person.) After the show, Jennifer and I strolled down to Rockafellar Center, where we enjoyed a Magnolia's Cupcake. We even saw Hoda walking around (from the Today show.) Later, we went down to Chinatown where Jennifer bargained for the first time for a watch and a purse. I was proud of her :)

It was sad to drop Jennifer off at the airport today - she will be missed. My heart longs for friends like Jennifer here in NYC - I'm learning it's much harder to make them after college.

Back to my internship tomorrow - only 3.5 weeks until I graduate!
Much Love

Philadelphia!

I must say, one of the major perks about living on the East Coast is how easily (and affordably) we can travel to different cities. This weekend, Jeff and I hopped on the Megabus to visit his brother, Bob and Heather in Philadelphia. I had traveled there once with Jeff, but merely for a lunch-date with Jon. We stayed three nights and had a great time. Although Jeff and I have a heart for the city of Detroit, Bob and Heather tried to convince us that God wanted us in Philly :) Philly has a lot of economic (or lack thereof) similarities with Detroit - although it is obvious Detroit is in a far worse state. Philadelphia is more aesthetically pleasing compared to Detroit - there are beautiful parks (with hills and trails) dispersed amongst the city.

Jon works for Whole Foods, so we obviously enjoyed a delicious meal there. Jon also loves to cook - even though I'm not a breakfast food kind of gal, I couldn't resist his potato, sausage and egg feasts in the morning. I also had a Philly Cheesesteak for the first time (really, it's a man sandwich - meat and cheese.) Heather and Bob took us on a tour of the city when Jon was working - within city limits there are ghettos, parks, suburban homes and high-end condominiums. Very interesting...

(I realized as I wrote the last paragraph that all but one of my Philly experiences circled around food...hmmm)

My absolute favorite part about visiting Philly was......Godfrey and Francis (in the pictures below.) Godfrey and Francis are Bob and Heather's goldendoodles. I am in love. We took them to the park one day, and I spent several hours cuddling with them while the guys played videogames (I thought the 'videogame' phase ended when you got married?)

Jeff and I were really grateful for a good time, with good food and remarkable people in Philly.



Over the past couple of weeks I have been dealing with some major anxiety. Spiritual attack? Maybe... I have been having such a hard time setting emotional boundaries...I am in constant fear of a relapse (not of my own, but my dads.) I was stressing out about finding a job (which the Lord provided..) I am freaked out about not getting all of my hours for graduation.... it's exhausting. Also, never in my life have I had a problem with caffeine. Now, after I drink caffeine or have chocolate my heart races which keeps me up at night...THEN a lack of sleep stresses me out. It's an endless cycle.

To learn more about emotional boundaries, I've been reading "Emotionally Healthy Spirituality". Right now, I am learning about how generational sins effect our relationships with others. It's been pretty challenging and encouraging. I want to face these generational sins head-on so my children, and my children's children, aren't effected by them.

Well, I need to get some reading done.
Much Love.

Early Intervention

So it's official...I've accepted a job offer! God has been so gracious to Jeff & I - I feel so blessed to have a job here in New York City starting June 1. For the past year or so I have been constantly stressing about finding a job in NYC. In order to be a speech therapist here for anyone between the ages of 3-21 (that's a HUGE age range!) I need to have my New York State Teaching Certificate. Well, the process of obtaining my teaching certificate is arduous, and although I am still pursuing it, I don't need it for an early intervention position (for infants and toddlers 0-3 years old.) AND I am automatically granted the teaching certificate after my first 9 months as a speech pathologist. God's provision is good. He is constantly reminding me that I DON'T have to be a stress ball about ANYTHING - it is in His hands. I am currently obsessed with learning more about the speech, language and feeding development of 0-3 year old babies.

The position is a 'home-care' position. Not only do I get to work with precious babies, but I also get to work alongside their family in their homes. This is such a great opportunity to love on families (and their children) with the perfect love of Christ. As I learn more about Early Intervention, I am realizing how great New York's program is, and how poor the state of Michigan's services are. A new dream of mine is to bring the skills I am learning (and will continue to learn) in New York City about Early Intervention to the city of Detroit. When I tutored at Hope (my church in Detroit), my heart was broken for the kiddos there - so many of them had speech and language, reading and learning disabilities that were not ever noticed or treated. Many of this issues can be detected at an early age, which can prevent the later development of more serious disabilities.

Stop, Rest, Delight, Contemplate

As Jeff and I journey through lent, we have committed (along with many members of our church, New Life Fellowship) to take Sabbath. This has been SO difficult for me! 24 hours (from 6pm on Saturday to 6pm on Sunday) of NO work. No homework, no job applications, no cleaning....just stopping, resting, delighting and contemplating in The Lord and what He has blessed us with. Something major that I've learned within the past three weeks of lent is that the Lord has commanded us to take Sabbath and that we need to trust Him to get our "to-do's" completed on another day. Being intentional about spending time in the word, in prayer and contemplating what the Lord is doing in our lives...it has been life-giving.

Jeff and I are also reading our pastor's book, Emotionally Healthy Spirituality (Pete Scazzero.) Thus far, I get the sense that what he thinks a lot of Christians are missing in their journey through life is the integration of emotional health and contemplative spirituality. Recognizing that it is almost impossible to have a healthy emotional life without a contemplative relationship with The Lord and, vice versa, it is impossible to have an honest contemplative relationship with the Lord without emotional health. I totally agree with this idea. There are so many Christians walking around with their hyper-spiritual and over-involved lifestyles that are not emotionally healthy. In the first chapter, Pastor Pete discusses some of the signs of unhealthy spirituality. Something that was really convicting (and encouraging) in this section was about how it's unhealthy to die to the wrong things. As I struggle living in New York City - away from my family, home and the city of Detroit - I have been burdened with so much guilt and shame. Why don't I love New York City? Why does my heart long to be in Detroit? Why do I desire to be close to my family? I do not want my feelings to give Jeff the sense that I am dissatisfied with him, our marriage or where the Lord has us right now. Should I die to these desires for home? I often thought of Luke 9:23 where Jesus said, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me." Maybe what Jesus meant when he said this was that we are to DIE to the SINFUL parts of us, not our natural desires that The Lord has instilled on our heart. God plants desires in our hearts so that they might be nurtured and He can use those desires to bring Him glory. Ahh, so refreshing.

My baby brother, Peter (okay, he's no baby - he's 21!) just interviewed at Wayne State University's Medical School (the school I'm at, my dad graduated from AND my grandpa graduated from!) He rocked the interview, and will probably get in (Lord willing.) I CANNOT believe he is going to be a Doctor. I am so proud of the man he has become. Over the past year his heart has softened and his personality has really blossomed. I feel so blessed to be a part of his journey.

On another note, I have two job interviews tomorrow. One with a rehabilitation staffing company, and another with an Early Intervention agency. I'm just praying that God would make it obvious where He wants me - even if it's not at one of these specific locations. Please pray that He continue to lead my path towards the job where I will be used for His glory most. Please also pray that the Lord would continue to direct the path of Jeff's and my marriage and our future.

Lastly, something the Lord has really blessed me with in New York City is a babysitting job with a really loving family. The occupational therapist at my school has two sons and has had me come over to babysit a few times now. She has two boys (4.5 and 1.5) that are so precious. They have an affinity towards Jeff, too. Last night, Jeff and I went over there to babysit and the 4.5 year old couldn't keep his hands off of him! It was really beautiful to see my husband love on, connect and play with kids. It makes me excited to have babies with him someday (in the far away future, haha.)

Well, Jeff plays violin tonight at church (mmm, i love that!) so I have to get going.

Much Love.